Beyond Pride #7: Beyond Hate
As I close this week of discussion, I’d like to leave with the following:
“Piece of #### .. your kind needs to be extreminated from the face of the planet .. regardless if you offend or not .. sicko”
“You need to be put down”
“All you pedophiles need to just die ... your too sick in the head to be alive and you are a THREAT to children.. better off dead.”
These are just three responses I pulled from the YouTube comments for Elizabeth Letourneau’s TEDMED talk. In it she discusses discovering and talking with non-offending minor-attracted people. So, what inflammatory comments sparked the above responses?
The first two above are in response to: “as a non-offending pedophile (map) this makes me so happy that people are starting to realize that people like us exist out there”
The last comment was a response to this: “As a non-offending pedophile myself, this video means the world to me. Thank you so much for airing this episode. I needed it. People need it.”
In other words, these responses of hate are because some MAPs were offering appreciation for someone recognizing their success in not harming children.
I’m happy to say that I’ve received nothing even remotely close to these this week, but these reactions are both why I felt I had to do this and also why I waited so long to begin. It is easy to believe these hateful comments are simply the bravado of people hiding behind the anonymity of the internet. However, I was actually told something very similar face-to-face. That person didn’t know that I was a MAP, but the topic came up in a discussion and he stated, bluntly, that the only way to deal with such people was violent castration or death.
I don’t hate him for those opinions and I don’t bring it up to revile him. He was operating out of an ignorance that he had no real means of dispelling. When a topic is beyond discussion, it would be extremely judgmental of me to expect others to understand it at the level I do.
To those of you who have shared these posts, I am eternally grateful. I know that my message is a hard one to attach yourself to. However, every additional person who reads this is another person who is a part of the discussion, even if only passively, and is another step at eliminating that ignorance.
As I wrap up this series of essays, I beg that you will continue pointing people to this discussion. You can direct them to my Facebook, but the essays are also up on my website at wileyhaydon.com/blog.
I know you may not be convinced yet that what I’m doing here is a good thing. Maybe you quietly agree more with the comments at the start of this essay. To that, I offer one final plea.
Minor attracted people are not going away. In fact, at the moment they are all around you and you don’t know it. I think one of the reasons you’ve seen positive responses from others is because they know me well. They know that I’m a thoughtful, loving person who tries desperately to be moral. They recognize that MAPs aren’t always obvious and that by continually pushing them into the dark all we do is encourage them to hide.
The simple truth is that you know minor-attracted people. You don’t know who they are, and they probably blend in seamlessly with “normal” people. Almost everyone I’ve told have been absolutely shocked by the revelation.
So, there’s a choice to be made. We can allow MAPs to come out and get help, improving their lives and decreasing the risk of them harming children. Or we can stay as we are, living in a fog that hides MAPs from view, but leaves them alone in the darkness with little chance to get help.
I’ll continue to post at least one new essay a week further exploring this topic and others related to it. I hope you’ll continue to read, share, and discuss them with me. Again, if you have any questions or comments, my email is firstname.lastname@example.org
Thank you again for reading.