Beyond Pride #1: The Good Fight

For me, the end of June is a time of contemplation and confusion. For one, the 25th of the month marks my birthday, and while there is always sufficient joy in the celebrations, every passing year also serves as a reminder of the fleeting nature of life. With the fortieth such party only a year away, it’s easy for my focus to narrow and for me to reflect on and what I’ve accomplished in my life. Or, perhaps, all the things I haven’t.

That’s hardly the only cause of introspection, though. June has another tag that assigns an even more convoluted bundle of emotions to the month of my birth. We call it Pride Month, and this designation causes me some consternation. Not just the confusion inherent in sorting how my Christianity intersects with those in the LGBTQ world, but indeed how I personally connect with them.

At the age of fourteen, I started to suspect that I wasn’t like the other guys at my Christian high school. I never went on a date in my teen years. I just couldn’t seem to find any incentive to get excited about dating. There were girls I liked, but none of them really interested me in a way that made me willing to step out of my comfort zone in order to pursue a relationship. I knew that was odd, but I’d been odd as long as I can remember. Being the nerdy outsider was simply status quo for me, so I took this as an expected turn within that playbook.